Grief Counseling
Seeking help after a loss can be difficult. We can often feel lost in our grief when navigating beliefs on what qualifies as a loss or if we have an idea of how we think we are “supposed” to grieve. Below are some examples of grief that may resonate with you as you navigate life after loss.
Disenfranchised Grief
Disenfranchised grief is generally grief that is not usually openly acknowledged, socially accepted or publicly mourned. Examples of disenfranchised grief include loss of a pet, perinatal losses, elective abortions, terminations for medical reasons, loss of a body part, loss of a personality from dementia, change in health, loss of a job and so on. While society may not deem our grief appropriate, it is still very much real.
Anticipatory Grief
Grief is often understood to happen after a loss occurs, but people expecting a loss may also experience anticipatory grief. This means experiencing the emotions associated with grief before the expected loss actually happens. Rather than grieving the loss of a person, anticipatory grief might be better understood as grieving the loss of experiences, possibilities or an imagined future together.
Ambiguous Loss
Ambiguous loss is a person's profound sense of loss and sadness that is not associated with a death of a loved one. It can be a loss of emotional connection when a person's physical presence remains, or when that emotional connection remains but a physical connection is lost. Often, there isn't a sense of closure. Examples can include; grief over soldiers missing in action, a child who has run away or been abducted, a loved one whose body was never recovered after a terrorist attack, or family and friends who drift from one another or become estranged.
Loss and Grief are Unique
At the end of the day loss and grief are unique to the person experiencing the loss. Multiple factors play into how someone could be experiencing their loss; cultural beliefs, shattered assumptions, length of relationship, type of loss, reaction from the people around them, and so forth. There is no one who can tell you that your grief is not valid simply because they do not see or experience it the same way. Your grief does not need validation in order to exist.
“To live in hearts we leave behind is not to die”